Daters Gonna Date (Chapter 2)

It's been a week since I started using the dating site, and I must say my opinion of it fluctuated a lot in my first 48 hours of using it.

Here's a link for part 1 of my online dating (intro)


Initial impressions, first 24 hours

After setting up my account and answering personality questions that would presumably match me up with ladies that had similar personalities, I browsed through the list of girls that they said I matched up well with. I had no idea how I would "approach" these girls, so my strategy was to take a few things from each of their profiles and try starting a "conversation" about the said topics.

My first week goal was to message a few girls a day, with the expectation that some wouldn't respond. I started with my strategy and started messaging a few girls. The first day total of messages was about 6 or 7. No messages back.

Great. Now it was feeling exactly like applying for jobs when I was unemployed. The profile and picture acting as the cover letter/resume and the girls as the jobs I am applying for. Except in this case, I was not as frustrated with the dating site as I would be applying for work. I figure some patience and due dilligence.

A few more messages sent the next day, no response yet. I had in mind a goal of messaging throughout the week and see the results that came from it, so no worries.

Some Breakthrough

As I am in between doctor's appointments Monday evening, I reach out to another girl and finally get a response back like 20-30 minutes later. After a few exchanges the same evening, we started talking on yahoo messenger. These conversations would take place a few times the next 3 days, a few hours each convo. We ended up setting up a date for this upcoming Tuesday. She seems to have a lot in common and contributes a lot to the conversations, which with most new people, I'm not used to.

In the meanwhile, there were a few other responses, including a facebook connection that has resulted in some conversation - but not as much. So out of the 12 or so messages I sent out, I batted 25%, which is a lot better of a ratio than I could say about a job hunt - so perhaps it wasn't as correct of an analogy as I made it out to be.

Must say that I am impressed with the site so far. It might be one of the better decisions I made in the 2nd half of 2011 - time will tell. All I know is that I "talked" to a lot more girls (or so I think they're women) on this site this week than I would have in any given week.

I'm not the type of guy who picks up girls at bars or goes to clubs and gets women that way. Pretty much every girl I've met and gotten to know has been because she was friends with my friend and we just so happened to meet that way. I feel like I've exhausted just about all of those options, so the dating site was the next logical step.

With a date in my back pocket for this week, I'd say it's been so far, so good. I hope my update next week will be sharing the same sentiments.

Ruining the Fantasy: My Biggest Fantasy Football Pet Peeves

I just got back from hanging out at my friend Nick's. Towards the end of the night, we started discussing something that will be part of his next podcast- (here's a link of his podcast that he does with another friend and B-Bo Knows reader Chris Williams). The topic of conversation was fantasy football and some of its downfalls. This is a topic that I've been wanting to write about for a while, and no better time to do it than a week away from the NFL season starting. In no particular order, here are some pet peeves of mine concerning fantasy football:

(1) Caring more about your fantasy team than your actual favorite team. One problem with fantasy leagues that has developed over the years is people rooting more for their fantasy team than their team itself. It's not true for all fantasy owners, but there are many people who make less-than-convincing arguments that they want their fantasy football player (let's say Adrian Peterson) rush for 200 yards and 4 TDs, but in a 45-35 Bears victory. There's no possible way you can convince me that you rooting for a guy to do well against your team but rooting for the team to win isn't contradicting your fanhood. If you have Adrian Peterson, great. Start him against your favorite team, as you cannot bench a guy of his talent. But don't actively root for him to do well when in effect, it's actually doing harm to your real team.

(2) If I'm not in your league, I really don't care who is on your team. You'd think that me being a fantasy football nut that I'd be more interested in your team. Nope. Not one bit. If I'm not in the league in question, I care very little about your round-by-round analysis. Sure, there's some aspects that may be interesting to mention (like a tidbit on when a guy got drafted). But if I don't ask about your team, you don't really need to tell me everything about your team. Best of luck to your team is the most supportive thing I can say. I hope you win.

These last three are more about the leagues themselves vs. actual critiques of fantasy football.

(3) Any league that has less than 12 teams is not a real league.  I know a few people that play in 8 team leagues and tell me all about their stacked teams. Guess what? Your team SHOULD be stacked. In a 15 round draft setup, a 12-team league drafts 180 players. In an 8-team league, it's only 120. That leaves an extra 60 guys on the free agent wire that would normally be owned in a regular (i.e. 12 team) league. I draw the line at 10-team leagues, but don't do those for money. All of my leagues are 12 teams, and I'd actually like to get into a 14 or 16 team league. That's where great fantasy owners separate themselves from average ones. Otherwise, every team is an all-star team and more of a crapshoot than it already is.

(4) Don't trade me a player before the season starts that you drafted many many rounds after the player you wanted. If I wanted the player that you offered me in a trade, I would have picked him in one of the 4-5 rounds before you picked him. Please don't try playing me for a fool. It also doesn't help when the garbage player that you offer to me is off your team about a week later.

(5) Please look at my roster before offering me a trade. I am not going to trade someone on my team if it's a thin position on my team. I am also not going to accept a trade when the player(s) I will be getting in return offer no value to my team. Please look at my roster when you are offering a trade and make sure the trade finds a way to benefit both trades.

There's probably others I can't think of right now, but these are the main ones. If this offended you as a fantasy owner, good.

To all of you fantasy football players, best of luck - I really do mean that. Just don't lose sight of your real team and don't play me for a fool if you're in a league with me.

College Football - Week 1 Bets

....

Sike!

None.

Are you shocked? I kinda am. I usually have some kind of action every day of the NCAA season outside of the bowl weekends.

It's necessary for me to maintain discipline this year, especially in week 1 where absolutely nothing looks great to bet. The cupcake part of the schedule is right now for teams such as Alabama (38 point favorites), Ohio State (laying 34 against Kent State), and other ridiculous spreads.

LSU against Oregon would be the only game I'd consider betting, but I have no read on that game.

If you have followed this blog since last year (almost reached the one year mark of the blog being active), you know that this discipline is somewhat rare. My main point of emphasis this year when it comes to gambling- and it should be yours too - is not to force bets for the sake of betting.

Have a great Labor Day Weekend  everyone.

Tempering My Expectations

Last year was the first year of gambling every week of the NFL season where I ended up profitting. A sharp record of 44-29 in the regular season (an additional 6-5 in the playoffs) led to $605 profit/$88 in postseason. For those of you who know gambling, I'll give you a breakdown on how I did in analyzing certain angles of the games. I'll combine playoffs and regular season:

Betting on:
Favorites - 9-13 (-$257)
Underdogs - 19-10 ($313)
Overs - 13-6 ($430)
Unders - 8-4 ($267)

If only I could have avoided betting on favorites! I had an over/under streak of 10 in a row in December (note: for gambling novices, over/unders are the lines set by Vegas that indicate the # of total points by both teams expected to be scored by both teams), which really pushed me over the edge.

So what does this mean for me this year?

Absolutely....nothing.

Brand new season means blank slate. It means different trends will have to be analyzed, different teams will have to be considered as good teams to back or bet against in favorable spots (i.e. fading teams). It also means that I have to maintain my same discipline that I had last year in order to profit again.

This gambling discipline includes not betting heavy amounts during a streak of winning and not chasing (betting for the sake of trying to "chase your losses"). Another thing I hope to do better this year is betting on isolated (i.e. primetime) games just for the sake of betting. I've fallen into this trap too many times when I don't have a great read on a game.

In order to profit again, I'm gonna need to practice what I preach. While I'm not sure I should expect to do better than last year (59% clip over a season for a full-time gambler is about as high as you should expect), I think my knowledge of teams and trends - in addition to these habits I picked up on last year - should help me succeed in making some more money again in 2011-12.

Better Date Than Never (Intro)

This afternoon, I spent a couple hours conquering one of my biggest social phobias. No, it wasn't drinking outside naked (psh, like I'd be afraid of that). Today, for the first time, I set up an online dating account. It doesn't sound like something that someone should be afraid of admitting that they use.

Maybe it wasn't so much being afraid of admitting to use as it was that I just assumed that my random daily life of going out would have me meeting new people on an occasional basis. As it turns out, unless you (or at least I) meet new friends from the current group of friends that you have, then it makes it very difficult to achieve this goal.

Ok, so maybe it was a small fear of admitting to use...

As you can figure out by now, I am single again. Nothing to weep about or say "I'm sorry" about - we both agreed about the different directions that we wanted to go and it was about as mutual of a breakup as there could be. After exploring a possibility that went nowhere, I decided that I would give this dating site crap a shot.

It wasn't until Friday where I seriously considered it though. My friend uses the site OkCupid and had it recommended to him by a friend. It seems like he's had some bites, but nothing major yet. So I figure, why the hell should I be afraid to go on a site like this?

It's not like my normal single life ways of getting girls throughout the years were working. In the back of my mind though, I figured I'd want to meet women randomly and hope we connect and not depend on a match maker site. The stigma of being a loser who needs a site probably entered my mind, but why, I don't know. It's not like at the end of the day it matters how you meet.

I am fully on board now.

In fact, dating sites seem to be a better way of matching people with similar personalities. The 80 or so questions that I answered about myself and certain situations have (so far) matched me up with people who have similar likes and interests - assuming they are telling the truth in their profiles. I'd like to think they are, but maybe it's the naive part of me that believes that. I know I didn't fudge anything on my profile - for I would like to get the most I possibly can out of it.

I know of a few people that have used sites before with success. Whether they work long-term better than random meetings with people is up for debate. For someone such as myself that has limited resources on meeting new people consistently, online doesn't seem like a bad method of at least starting the conversation that would normally take place at a bar or party. And not only that, you're conversing with someone you believe to have similar interests as you already.

I've messaged a few girls so far - so we'll see if anything comes of it. I'm sure I'll share my story/stories of how it works (or if it doesn't). All I know is that I couldn't sit here making excuses anymore on not to use a site (especially a free one), so here goes nothing.

Wish me well.

Back to My Writing Roots

Suddenly feeling a creative writing buzz coming about.

This may be something I delete in time, depending on how it looks to me in a day/week/month, but here goes nothing.

I promise I'm not drunk, just inspired to write.

My Fuel

Like the best detective educating the sleuth,
It always helps to hear the truth.
No matter how hard it is to take,
It's only as bad as you want to make it.

Living in a world of fiction
Creates a state of confusion and friction.
They say the truth will set you free
But many worry about at what cost it will be.

Save me the sugar coat, I'm not hungry nor cold.
I'll sail on another boat. Gonna take this poker hand and fold it
Into the muck. Ran out of luck.
Like a Big Wheel facing a Monster Truck.

You thought I might find another word to rhyme in those above lines there.
The truth is, I just don't care.
Right now, I'm empowered by my sharpest tool-
The gift of word - my energy, my fuel.

No Time to Weight

It's been a week of being on medication and going to see a physical therapist, and so far, so good. The back appears to be getting better, and hopefully by the time the month's worth of physical therapy appointments are done, I will be back to normal. I'm really tempted to test it out by bowling a game, even though that's how I threw out the back. But for now, I'll be smart and sit it out while watching my teammates bowl. Watching from the sidelines has been difficult. When you get used to a routine - and when you're passionate about something like I am about bowling, it's tough to watch it and know you can't do it.

One thing I'm glad that I haven't missed too much, surprisingly, is beer. These medications (for pain reduction and muscle relaxing) are not to be taken with alcohol. I'm sure most medications are that way, but I've taken this as a serious warning. The few beers I have had in the past week have been well after I took my last medication (like 6-7 hours), and in each situation, I only drank a beer.

Even watching people drink hasn't been as bad as I thought. Normally, that would be the biggest form of pressure to drink - when your peers are pouring down the suds. The ability to resist has been better than I imagined.

I was told by my physical therapist that losing some weight would help the back. This has inspired me to try eating healthier in addition to the reduction in alcohol consumption. As of 8/15/2011, I sit at 217 pounds, so we will see how this change of diets (in addition to moving around a little bit) will help my weight loss (and in turn, my back).

I did so good with my working out the last time 3 years ago and threw it all away in the past year. I need to get in the workout mindset again. My friends Jen and Steve are doing a good job with it- so much so, that when they came over last week for a swim and BBQ, they brought over some turkey burgers.

I need to get into the eating right/exercising regimen again. Let's hope that I (as well as Steve, Jen and any of my other friends who are aiming to get healthy/healthier) can get this in order.