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| Just a hunch...this wasn't Edwards yearbook picture from senior year of high school. I could be wrong. |
Braylon Edwards (San Francisco 49ers Wide Receiver): At the beginning of the month, Edwards, already on probation for random dumb things he has done off the field, was at the scene of a brawl that left several people with injuries. During the time that the fight was taking place, Edwards tweeted the following statements:
"Damn. Get ya knuckles ready."
"Don't fight if [y]ou don't know how."
You can see where this is going...Tweets were deleted and then Edwards gives the classic "Someone else was using my phone" excuse.
Trust me, the newest player on my favorite team, I've tried that before. Doesn't work so well. So please, catch us some touchdown passes and....shut up.
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| Time to Play The (Blame) Game! |
The Game (a rapper, not Triple H): Friday afternoon, he posted from his Twitter account a phone number that was to lead his 500K fans to obtain information for some internship, but it was actually the number of an important LA emergency dispatch. The prank tied up lines for hours and actually prevented certain emergencies from being tended to.
Naturally, the hack defense was in play. The Game, who removed the tweets after someone in the police dept found the Twitter connection to the calls told him to stop, stated "It wasn't me (Shaggy voice)" on his tweet, and then proceeded to blame someone with the twitter name wackstar.
I believe you, Mr. Game, just as much as I listen to your music - not really. Sure, I've heard you on a few collaborations that I enjoyed, but perhaps you should treat your phone like a solo act (assuming you are telling the truth). How do all these people end up having their phones in the wrong hands? Must be a coincidence.
Time for a rainout on this game. Shut up. Game over.
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| I get a feeling this is how Zambrano's shrink visits go - at least he's consistently nuts. |
Carlos Zambrano: Anyone who has followed sports in Chicago over the past 6-7 years know the type of drama (that word being a severe understatement) that comes with the headcase that has the name of Carlos Zambrano. From fights with teammates and random outbursts that have occurred in his time as the supposed Cubs ace pitcher, there's been enough material going on with Zambrano to employ a city-full of shrinks.
His latest outburst on Friday (imploding on the field and then clearing out his locker and saying he was retiring) should be the icing on the cake for his career with the Cubs, who put him on the 30-day disqualified list (which means he won't get paid). I'll be honest - I never heard of this list before. Thankfully, I can credit Big Z for allowing this list to enter my life in the sports realm.
Zambrano is protesting his suspension, claiming he was not serious about retiring despite the fact that he completely cleared his locker and Cubs GM Jim Hendry basically accepting his retirement statement as fact. He said to Chicago Tribune Live that his statements of retirement were meant to stay in the clubhouse, apparently not realizing that there's pretty much media scattered everywhere. I'm sure he wasn't whispering this stuff in the locker room either, so again, he has no one to blame but himself. But does he blame himself? Ha! - about as much as Edwards and Mr. Game did.
Carlos - how's about you go hang out with Chief, Nurse Ratched and the others at the Cuckoo's Nest, get some electroshock therapy, and live the rest of your life in a padded room? Please Big Z...shut up.
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| He may end up being "Our Quarterback", but Rex needs to leave the terrible predictions to Miss Cleo |
Rex Grossman (Washington Redskins QB): I almost forgot about this idiot. He has gone on record as saying that Washington will win the NFC East. Doing a lot of talking for a guy who might not even be a starter. The infamous John Beck (who hasn't started a game since 2007) seems to have the inside edge at the moment. But it really doesn't matter who heads this ship.
I guess Grossman has nothing to lose by saying this (everyone expects the Redskins to suck and finish last in the division). There's a good reason they are a 150/1 shot to win the Super Bowl. If Shannahan could lead this team to a division title, it'd be more impressive than any of the Super Bowl wins that he got because of Elway & Terrell Davis.
But for now, Grossman seems to be writing checks that I don't think anyone, even their "Making It Rain" owner named Daniel Snyder, could cash.
Be content you still have an NFL job Grossman, and just shut the hell up.
I'm sure there's more knuckleheads to write about, but these are the one's I've come across in the past couple weeks that have provided the most unintentional humor in terms of just being stupid.
Thank you gents for the inspiration to write the Shut Up blog. Feel free to disregard my advice and keep talking (Big Z probably will ignore my words - so thank you in advance).
