Oh hey, my blogspot still exists! The last time I wrote something here, my Grandma Raynor had passed and I had just launched my first recording of the B-Bo Knows podcast. So yeah, it's been a while.
Writing these thoughts here because I want to get them down as it's always been my best way in dealing with the shit life throws at me.
Monday October 25th, 2021 - my wife and I are in Vegas for what is the last full day of our trip. We enjoy a tasty breakfast in Hendersonville, drive to and around the Hoover Dam to see one of the most spectacular man-made creations, drive around the area to see the gorgeous scenery, go to the Red Rock Casino for a few adult beverages and a filling lunch. We go back to Hendersonville to stay at our place for the weekend for one last evening (thank you to Johnny Nissan and his mom for their generosity in lending us a place to stay while we were there). We go out for steak and then head to Circa where I am fortunate enough to hit a few numbers on roulette and win 400-500 bucks.
Unfortunately, this is the last day I can recall without some kind of major stressor in mind.
On the ride home from the airport the next day, my parents inform us of our flooded basement that occurred while we were gone. That process from beginning to end lasts about 5 weeks. Towards the end of that time, while the restoration people were on the latter end of the basement repairs, a yard-adjacent neighbor on the street next to ours notices a big crack in the biggest tree in our yard, best seen from her yard. I get close to the tree and hear creaking. Nope, a tree ain't supposed to do that.
Days and $1800 later, the tree comes down over the span of 8 hours. The tree, I believe hickory, had to have been at least 70+ years old and over 100 feet high. The shade it provided will be missed this spring and summer. The remains of that tree still need to be sawed and made into firewood, of which I will have plenty for years to come now.
While I stand corrected - there was a little void in major stressors, the void was short-lived. Almost two weeks ago, one of our cats took a hard fall from a play fight tackle initiated by another of our cats, and his demise into kitty heaven culminated three days later.
This segue is not super clean, as it involves sports and rooting interest in teams. The one thing that brought me joy in days after our furball's passing was the 49ers last-second victory over the Green Bay Packers. I briefly wept for the victory while trying to unwind from the stress that we have been feeling. This was a perfect example of sports providing the escape many of us crave when we absorb the team we grow to love and whatever important game it is about to play.
The victory, in combination with the events from the next day, resulted in a matchup with the LA Rams, who the Niners have beaten twice this season. Long story short, Niners blew a 10 point 4th quarter lead (like they did in Feb 2020 vs. Kansas City in the Super Bowl), no thanks to a decision to punt midway through the final quarter on the Rams side of the field right after the Rams had just burned their final timeout.
In the moments following the end of the game and my car ride home, I tried to ponder what makes us want or need to root for a sports team. Love of our sports teams is a world-wide thing spanning countless sports. Our moods are often dictated by how well they are playing. Are they playing like shit like they always do? Figures. Did they just win a big game for the first time in a while? Hell yeah, I hope they do it again soon.
In my case, this is the second tough ending to a season in the last 24 months. In both cases, there was a specific decision or set of decisions that stood out to me. In the Super Bowl, it was when Shanahan went super conservative and decided that running out the first half while tied (with a full assortment of time outs) was more important than trying for an extra 3-7 points against one of the best offenses of the modern era. While they did get a 10 point lead in the 3rd, they ended up allowing 3 fourth-quarter touchdowns en route to the loss.
So, again, why the hell do we do it? There are many reasons. I think providing a distraction is one of the biggest reasons. A sense of belonging when you get to bond with fellow fans is certainly another.
I know better than to expect the result of a sporting event to change anything tangible in life. Just sucks when the result ends up being a shit sandwich of disappointment and heartache.
And all of these annoyances would be enough for anyone, but we're still in the midst of a pandemic that has engulfed the planet since March 2020. This alone has caused many of us, including yours truly, to go through waves of emotions as we try to navigate through everything that has changed since then, not to mention trying to avoid catching the virus. Even those who have written it off as "just the flu" have to admit that catching the flu actually still sucks and is not fun (death or not).
I don't know where I was going with this. I think I just needed to get this out in a forum of sorts. Ever since I was younger, I have always written when I was in a weird state of mind. Many poems in my teenage years reflect the thoughts of a teenager who was trying to make sense of the world around him. This feels no different. There's a lot around us that has the potential to cause us stress. And for many of us, it is hard to avoid that stress. It will come your way whether you try to hide from it or face it.
If you ever need a sounding board for shit you are going through, holler at your boy. Thanks for reading this far, and I wish you and yours good health and personal fortune.
