Dear government (you don't deserve a "G" until you can earn us more "G"s),
I found a way to get us out of this mess. It has nothing to do with policies, nothing to do with addendums to bills that you may not like, nothing to do with politics at all.
In fact, it may be something that you may find hard to tax. But leave it to me to give you guys a chance to find something new to tax. I'm pretty sure everything in my sight has a tax to it at this point.
Sell me some happiness.
Yes, happiness.
The happier consumers are, the more they will buy. Get them to win some horse races and share stories with how awesome their new dating interest is, and watch how much more money they spend than they originally planned on.
(If you haven't figured out that this letter is written by me about me, then you should stop reading now.)
Show me a person who is happy, and I'll show you someone who is more willing to spend money on things than the average person.
Depressed people spend money only on booze.
Happy people spend money on that and then some. They don't even realize how much they spend until they look at their new credit card bill weeks later.
Consider me a potential buyer into this system.
Consider me an actual buyer. I'd show you the bill for my BBQ for tomorrow, but the receipt is too long. And that has to do with effects from happiness - from the track winnings and life in general.
If you can find a way to bundle happiness for others to buy, then I think we will be ok.
Rig a horse race or two if you have to. Whatever it takes.
Love,
Brian
P.S. Happy Father's Day to all of those good fathers out there. Bill Bolek - that especially means you.
P.P.S. Mentioning my dad in a social medium and expecting him to read it is about as pointless of a sentence as there can be read in this world.
